Yes, I am now calling these TyRants.

Anyway, I LOVE Mario, but I've done some thinking, there is a LOT to work with here. So, here we go!

First off, note that Mario and Luigi are plumbers. But, aside from the VERY first game(where you're underground and enemies are coming from pipes) and this one part in Mario and Luigi's Superstar Saga(You walk into this castle, and this lady's all "You're plumbers!" Before kicking you underground and telling you "FIX PIPES NAO!"), does that really come into play? Nope. Except for the outfits. I mean, you don't even get to bash the bad guys' heads in with a monkey wrench!

Secondly, Bowser. I mean, the guy has what, 8 kids? And there's like, no Mom in sight. Where's the Mom? I dunno, maybe he knocked up that old magikoopa witch...8 times. And he's always sending these things to do his dirty work. He's a TERRIBLE father. Though, each kid does get their own castle, in a separate part of the world, complete with their own minions and unique interior decorating. So, he knows how to provide for his kids. Maybe Bowser's like the head of this mutant-turtle-dinosaur...thing mafia?

But seriously, why is he always after Princess Peach? I mean, she's not all that attractive. And she's obviously helpless and gullible. And stupid. And Mario always beats the crap out of Bowser for kidnapping her. Though, what Mario sees in her, I don't know...

I mean, she's surrounded by these midget...things...wearing mushroom hats and diapers. Did I mention she's dumb, gullible and helpless? Though, Bowser DID manage to convince Bowser Jr that Peach was his Mom. Sadly, I don't know whether to pat Bowser on the back for that, or kick him in the rear.

And what's with all the mushrooms? Superfungus? It's a bit..I dunno..."Shrooms give you powers and make you grow?" And all the weird suits that vary from game to game.(Note, I'm only hitting on the Adventure games, not that Party, Sports, Racing, etc spin-off crap.)And the stars? They make you invincible, but only to an extent. Sure, bad guys can't touch you. But step in lava or off of the edge, and your DED.

Though, I LOVE the music. Especially the Invincibility music. But, I would love to hear Indestructible by Disturbed playing when you got the star.

OOH! And the ship! I love that pirate ship with the propellers. It's win. Not to mention, I believe each kid has their own one of those too. But, I must say, that little bowl thing with the face and the propeller that Bowser rides around in is the coolest villain ride EVER.

Then there's Yoshi. I mean, I LOVE Yoshi, but Mario's holdin' him back. Sure, yoshi can fare on his own really well. But Mario's always riding the thing's back. And notice, ALL YOSHI LAY EGGS. That CAN'T be natural. It's just...eew.

Okay, now to wrap it up with the point we've all been waiting for. LUIGI! I am a BIG Luigi fan, as are most other Mario gamers. So, why doesn't Luigi get more games and stuff? Well, Luigi has Princess Daisy, as opposed to Mario's Peach. Unlike Peach, Daisy can fend for herself. So, Luigi has no need to go tiring himself out chasing after his girl like his brother(who, let's face it, I doubt Mario's getting any). Anyway, while Mario's out going from castle to castle, saving Peach only to have her get kidnapped two seconds later, Luigi and Daisy are off somewhere. *winkwink--thumbsup*